MOTORING | Promises from Stellantis, swanky Germans and a Chinese poser

Many South African shoppers would be forgiven for thinking Stellantis was the name of a pharmaceutical company whose repertoire included prescriptions for fizzling libidos.

The handle still has an unfamiliar coldness to it — which belies an exciting portfolio of storied brands under its banner — some with more sex appeal than others, but all certainly steeped in heritage. In case you missed it, Stellantis arose from the global merger in 2021 between Fiat Chrysler Automobiles and PSA Groupe, which combined Peugeot, Citroën and Opel.

In addition to those marques, the operation features Alfa Romeo, Abarth, Jeep, Maserati and the Fiat Professional commercial vehicles arm. The company is a real giant in Europe. But, despite the clout of such an inventory, the group still struggles to get it up in the local monthly new vehicle sales game, barely mustering volumes beyond the 500 mark in our country. You could chalk that up to a few things.

Think perceptions around reliability, after-sales service and other serious factors that are overlooked amid the haze of industry glitter and rampant influencer campaigns.

Can the Stellantis marketing brains honestly say they have done enough to rid those dark spectres that still haunt their brands? I should stop at this point — lest I wake up on Monday to the horror of a severed Alfa Romeo Giulia cylinder head in my bed. Last week, Stellantis summoned us to Gerotek, that fascinatingly spooky Armscor-owned test facility in Tshwane, to convince us of its staying power.

The biggest point was that plans to build the Peugeot Landtrek bakkie in Gqeberha, announced last year, were still under way. The first units are expected to roll off the line in 2025. Then it had a surprise in the form of a compact Italian with a heavyweight reputation, unveiled for the first time on local soil.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the nuova elettrica Fiat 500e will go on sale later this year, as well as the feisty Abarth iteration. Sadly, we could not drive the show units flown in. Nor could we twist arms into getting indicative pricing. But don’t expect either model to come in cheap.

Speaking of rich experiences, this month we had the rare opportunity to luxuriate in the updated SUV flagship from Mercedes-Benz. Styling tweaks and plusher interior appointments build on the large, intimidating character cemented by the GLS.

But it was also a reminder that there are many levels to this wealth thing. At R2,3m, the regular diesel model will impress the average motorist.

Still, you can flaunt your success more assertively with the Mercedes-AMG GLS 63 version for a cool R4.2m — which includes a thundering V8 engine.

That might even be too mainstream for some tastes. In which case, the Mercedes-Maybach GLS 600 is the one to have — not exactly a steal at R4.5m.

This one can be had with a trick air-suspension system that allows the vehicle to hop up and down like an Energizer bunny.

Mercedes-Benz representatives themselves struggle to keep a straight face when asked in which context this feature would be useful. Apparently, Middle East customers find the bounce functionality useful when mired in the soft, sandy dunes. Take their word for it.

In April, fellow Germans BMW launched the second generation of the rebellious X2. In its original 2018 form, the oddball crossover made a statement with weird cues such as inverted kidney grilles and the iconic BMW roundel logos in its C-pillars.

Those traits are now gone, and the overall package is decidedly more grown up, but it still stands out as a rebel among the compact offerings of the Munich brand. The least expensive three-cylinder sDrive18i version (just north of R879,000) brings punchy acceleration, sensible economy and pleasant cruising manners.

Turn the wick up with the M35i (R1.2m), which packs a more expressive M Sport execution, larger alloys and its party piece, a 233kW/400Nm engine. Acceleration is suitably energetic, and the acoustics are replete with those novel flatulent overtures everyone loves.

If you want a crossover but feel less inclined to pay German prices, China might have a prospect for you in the form of the Omoda C5 GT.

Temper your expectations, though. Our recent encounter with the Eastern rival left us with mixed feelings.

On the one hand, there is something to be admired about its aspirational aesthetic, seemingly inspired by the 1990s Subaru Impreza WRX rally hero — gold wheels and a large spoiler.

But then there is the strained feeling of its heavily boosted 1.6-litre motor, linked to a dim-witted dual-clutch, garnished by crashy suspension tuning flummoxed by minor road imperfections.

And at just under R590,000, the model is not priced as competitively as we would have expected from the Chinese. You’d be better off looking at products such as the Volkswagen Taigo R-Line, the Peugeot 2008 GT-Line or the Toyota Corolla Cross GR-S if you want a crossover with an illusion of sportiness.